Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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