Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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