Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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