I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
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