Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
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