can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Randomize
