She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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