didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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