is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
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He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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