I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
