why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I deserve this hangover.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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