he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Randomize
