Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
