is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
