She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
my nose is crying tears of wow.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
