i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i already hear my dad disowning me
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
is it fun? or sober?
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
