The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
