Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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