I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
