You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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