I molested 6 butterflies tonight
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
