8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
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