I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
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