so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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