He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Randomize
