Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize
