I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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