pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
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