their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
