I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
