yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I met the friendliest cop last night
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
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