i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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