The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Randomize
