another moral hangover. fuck.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
i would punch a child for taco bell
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
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