stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
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