I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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