well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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