I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
