Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Randomize