I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize