I wish I only lived at night.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
