Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
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