i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Randomize
