Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize