can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
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Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
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his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
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