Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Randomize
