The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
