I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
