I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
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