Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Randomize
