I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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