dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
